I just got back from the 30th Halloween Horror Nights and folks, I’m happy to report that I still think this is the greatest Halloween event around. Back this year after a hiatus in 2020 for….obvious reasons, there were 10 haunted houses, five scare zones, and three decades of legacy to pull from. I’m mainly writing about my experience so that years from now, I can look back and remember what this event was like. This is less of a review and more of a time capsule!

The Houses

The Haunting of Hill House
Beetlejuice
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Universal Monsters: The Bride of Frankenstein Lives
HHN Icons: Captured
Welcome to SCarey: Horror In The Heartland
Case Files Unearthed: Legendary Truth
The Wicked Growth: Realm Of The Pumpkin
Puppet Theatre: Captive Audience
Revenge of the Tooth Fairy

Scare Zones

Crypt TV
30 Years 30 Fears
Seek and Destroy
Gorewood Forest
Lights, Camera, Hacktion: Eddie’s Revenge

So let’s start with the houses. I should note that while I went for three nights, we still somehow only managed to hit 8 out of the 10 - missing The Haunting of Hill House and Welcome to SCarey. Unfortunately the crowds were just too crazy and the wait times were a bit too long. Also, there was no way in hell I was dropping extra coin on an express pass just to be able to do everything.

Anyways, I really liked most of the houses we did manage to see and I don’t think there was a dud among the bunch. HHN Icons and Beetlejuice were incredible as I had imagined they would be. The Icons house was full of fan service for those like me who have been following the Halloween Horror Nights world for a long time. Bringing back all the characters I’ve never actually gotten to see in person, from Jack & The Undertaker to The Director & The Storyteller. Beetlejuice felt just like you were walking through the movie, with all of the signature Burton style and famous scenes you’d expect. You even got to see the miniature town that Alec Baldwin’s character builds in the attic!

My favorite houses of the bunch would have to be Revenge of the Tooth Fairy, and Case Files Unearthed: Legendary Truth.

Case Files

Step into the shoes of Boris Shuster, a hard-boiled private eye investigating the supernatural. Follow his search for clues into the darkness of a shadowy "film noir" world populated by ghouls, poltergeists and all manner of monstrous terrors.

Face horrific creatures in a seedy apartment, an abandoned warehouse, the Museum of Natural History and more.
Enter the Kitty Kat club where you’re attacked by terrifying she-devils.
Search for the totems that will complete the tale – the tale of a mystery that’s best left unsolved.

This house was a complete surprise for me, as I had NO idea what to expect going into it. The whole private investigator angle was really cool and the whole house had that classic, pulpy vibe that almost reminded me of Roger Rabbit in a way. Tons of cool monsters lurking in the shadows here and I really did dig the whole 1940’s vibe it had going for it.

Tooth Fairy

You’re about to discover the sinister reality behind the seemingly innocent childhood tradition. All children must give up their baby teeth to the goblinesque tooth fairies or pay a gruesome price. It’s an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

Step into an old manor house that has been swarmed by yellow-clawed fiends, dripping with blood, teeth and gore.
Grit your teeth as you see the evil fairies extract their toothed bounty by force while their victims struggle in vain.
Hold in your screams or risk exposing your own teeth to their monstrous grasping claws.

Once again, an original house wins out over an IP. There’s nothing wrong with an IP house (Bride of Frankenstein would probably be my third favorite behind these two) but there’s something to be said for a house you go into blind. This house was so FRIGGIN RAD. My favorite part about this one was the whole storybook angle they took in the beginning to set up the premise. You literally walked into a children’s pop-up book and I was totally blown away by it. Again, lots of cool monsters, some great scares and just overall the most fun I had in a house I think.

Scare Zones

Listen, I love a scare zone, but I’m not going to hang in this section too long. The scare zones this year were fine, but the only one that truly blew me away was the Gorewood Forest zone. Coincidentally, the last time I went to HHN, my favorite scare zone of that year (Trick ‘r Treat) was also along this wooded path, so I wonder if it’s just this area I like? Either way, I really thought the whole “evil woods” thing this scare zone had was really neat, and the creatures scattered throughout were really unique.

The Food

Good lord, the food. There was so much of it all around us, and it wasn’t even crappy theme park food! Seriously, the Horror Nights menu this year was incredibly impressive. There were tents all over the place where you could get signature food & drinks, and some of the tents were even themed to certain haunted houses, with menus to match. Here are some things we tried:

Bourbon Candied Pork Belly

These things were wild, man. I don’t know who dreamed these up, but they should probably be locked away for life. So these were essentially thick cut bacon, thrown on a skewer, and dipped in a candy apple shell. Listen, I know it sounds crazy, but this really tasted like spare ribs you get at a Chinese Buffet. It was a bit much, and I can’t say I’d ever get one again, but I’m happy I tried this concoction at least one time - if only to tell people I’ve eaten pork with a candy apple shell.

Bride of Frankenstein’s Swirl

This was my most anticipated food item at HHN by a long shot. I know it looks basic, but boy, looks can be deceiving. First off, let me start by saying I am an absolute fiend for ice cream and I’ll take it pretty much however I can get it. You show me a black & white ice cream in a black waffle cone, I’m intrigued. You tell me it’s inspired by the Bride of Frankenstein’s hair, I will applaud. You tell me it’s BLACK SESAME flavored, I throw my credit card at you and tell you to charge me whatever it takes to put that cone in my hand, brother.

Seriously, this ice cream was so dang good. I know a lot of you just got very nervous and possibly queasy when I mentioned that it was sesame flavored, but it really was a nice subtle flavor, with just a hint of nuttiness. Very pleasant and overall incredibly refreshing - perfect for the 90+ degree weather we had down here in Orlando. 10/10 would eat again.

Ghoul Juice

This was one tasty drink, and I definitely drank my fair share of it. Ghoul Juice is a mix of mango rum with cherry, lime and allspice. The color was a beautiful, pale orange and it looked absolutely insane when paired with this pink light-up collectors glass. I’m not usually a rum guy, but this was dang good and I may even try to recreate it at home!

Some other foods we tried, which were also really good:

Twisted Taters w/ a hot dog in the middle
No “Chance” in Hell PB&J: fried peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich with a hot honey drizzle
Jack Jar Cake
Stuffed Brisket Grilled Cheese: brisket, pepperjack cheese, onions, tomatoes on countryloaf

Shows

There were also two new shows to watch at HHN 30 - a pretty rad lagoon show with tons of projections, water fountains, lasers & lights, and the stage show which I’ve linked above called Nightmare Fuel. Listen, the show was cool and all, and it had WAY more fire than I assumed it would, but it would have been cool to see the infamous Bill & Ted’s Excellent Halloween Adventure return for this big anniversary year. This was their stage for 25+ years after all, and with their new movie coming out last year, I think it would have tied in nicely!

So to conclude this very long time capsule article, I’ll finish by saying that this was a really great year for Halloween Horror Nights! There was an incredible amount of fan service by bringing back some of the most loved Icons, and the amount of houses & scare zones made this feel like an event that shouldn’t have been missed!